20:48pm

I danced so much earlier on! I had all the regular tunes on, plus Reach for the Stars by S Club 7 which really added a little something-something to the routine. Then I found that you can get an ‘Exotic Dancing’ DVD and I was like HELLO!!! Haha. Maybe when I am lean and slender I will be able to complete what are referred to as ‘deliciously seductive grinds and gropes’. Oo-er.

My calves and shins ache a little, but I’m not even bothered, and I forced myself to go walking through the pain! I know, I rock.

I wish that I could jump into a nice warm vat of Tesco Finest Creamy Mashed Potato. We had some for dinner with sausages and ooooh, food orgasm . . . I whacked oodles of mature cheddar on as well, which made it even more lush. I had seconds. Why are you not surprised?

No. I haven’t had my ‘mingy tea’ yet. Quit pestering me. I’ll do it when I’m ready. Which I never will be. For the disgustingness that is. You know, I’m seriously considering getting a drip strung into my vein full of it. Then I would reap the benefits, and not have to taste it. But my fear of needles is nearly as big as my fear of the murky algae which I drink, so I’m not quite sure it would be worth it for all the kicking and screaming. At least it would be a good workout . . . something to consider.

Anyway, until then, I’d better just drink some. If I vomit it’s your fault. And you’ll have to live with that.

Sweet dreams lovelies.